The magic of life should not be taken for granted, France! You know that just as much as the rest of us! You are born of this earth, live off its riches and die in its dirt just like the rest of us. So why are you giving the false hope of magic hugs that make you become the sun? I always wanted to be to a Sun! A vicious ball of heat and gas and plasma that shines on everyone whether they want it or not (They can live in the habitable zone, I guess.) But no! I can’t be a sun! I can only shine a bright light on someone’s day by my kind words and demeanor! That’s not enough! I want to burn for a million degrees until I burn out and expand and consume the galaxy! Damn you, french animation short! Damn you and your false hope!

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s unaware of the badass thing he is doing while outside. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he’s the reason the hornets are so angry, not the basketball!

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Harvey Freeman had a vision. Well maybe not a vision; it was a meeting. It was at a crossroads. The dusty kind. The kind where the Devil hangs out. Harvey Freeman needed a winning idea and the Devil was the person to give it to him. Whatever he was given, he knew he could change the world. Harvey trusted in himself (and the devil) that much. However, even he wasn’t quite sure what to do with the Devil Sticks. He had to practice them for way too long for one. Everyone thought he was just messing around in the park. No. No he was not. He was nose deep into Stick Business and he was about to graduate with a S.D. (Stick Degree) and Devilnometry. Then, and only then, could he face off against his final boss; The Patent Office. The paperwork would bring him down, but the Harvey Freeman name would remain on high.

They’re kind of fun, too.

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he’s not going on The Curse of Oak Island anytime soon. John Hurst is your co-host and he should have guessed a higher number.

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Is it a Beautiful World? Who even knows! Target sure thinks so. Target is ready to sell your products as the sun is melting down all around us ready to consume us. Only one company stands in the way of total destruction and it turns out that mostly make carbonated soda beverages. And guns. Lots of citruses-y guns.

Also forcing other brands to expand outsider of their wheelhouse. I hear Slim Jims make for great saloon doors!

John Hurst is your host this week and he has to go back to Podcast Prison after this episode. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he’s working the skunkworks at Sunkist on the Balls Kicking Committee.

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The era of digital fansubs brought us everything. Everywhere. All at once! We had to have it all! We had to trade CD-Rs in big binders trying to gather it all like Pokemon. Even shows like Chobits, which I am personally convinced noone ever saw the ending to! We just saw the plasticy ears and figured out the rest of the show from there! Still, we torrented it. And some of us are still living in the hole in the ground for the trouble. City pop vibes, baby!

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Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he is taking his Persocom everywhere. John Hurst is your co-host and he’s got coyotes to fight before he gets internet again.

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People cried when the statues of the Virgin Mary shed tears of blood, but would you do the same for the Wendy’s Piss Fountain? I bet you would. It’s a beautiful sight made by our fast food benefactors from Dublin, Ohio. They’re giving you the greatest in free entertainment and promo codes for this. All you have to do is wave your little arms around and not worry about why you’re working the counter in a virtual fast food chain. They own you now. Don’t be too bothered by it. That’s how the internet works! You never looked at the Terms and Agreement before now, after all. Put on the VIB Visor. Your burger chariot is waiting (For other people, not for you. Get to work.)

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s wondering why that tomato has his legs. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he learned a valuable fast food secret from a college friend.

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