You’re done arguing with your friends! We can all agree going to the Werewolf versus Vampire movie is neutral ground, right? We weren’t all going to see Mystic River so you better damn well deal with this sci-fi creation under a blue light and you better be damn neutral about it! Look, there’s vampires! And Werewolves! They’re fighting! And she has a big ol’ sword she’s fighting them both with? Maybe one side? Which one? I don’t know, I wasn’t paying any attention. I was too busy trying to fly with these new eagle wings of mine. It’s kind of hard!

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he’s considering utility with animal powers. John Hurst is your co-host and he has re-written the rules of who gets “The Animal” nickname.

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It turns out that everything they warned us about is all true. Pokemon Cards are the devil’s work! The mere touch of a rare card is enough to convert your entire body into an explosion of pokemon cards and coalesce into something that looks quite like you… But different. Never will you be the same again and all your previous joys will be gone, replaced by Pokemon cards. You can’t even play the deck you like anymore. You are the deck, unable to change that one card that was definitely a poor decision. Stay away from the danger! Skate away, younglings!

John Hurst is your host this week and he is stealing all the world’s helium to be remembered by history. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he witnessed a living AI Model experiment in high school.

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No, I do not want to date your avatar. Unless your avatar is a Ragnarok Online model! Then maybe I would consider it! We would have spent ages levelling up together, so at the point where we may consider dating I would know if we were a good fit for each other. We’d also know what we thought of bees and web series by then so we could get a billboard together announcing are nupitals or something. Is that how marriage works? Better buy a second billboard just in case. And maybe hide my Runescape account.

Aaron “The Animal” Littleton Esquire is your host this week and he has a choice this week before we get the billboard up! John “The Animal” Hurst is ready to let you into heaven, as long as you don’t have a certain popular brand electronic device from Apple.

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We live in a society where we can get very specific descriptive pills faster than this Clue speedrun we watched on loop for this episode (At least, if you’re in America. We’ll privatize the shit out of anything!) Professor Plum will give you all the boner pills a podcast can buy! Maybe he even has his own podcast to hock them off of as well! With a sponsor code and everything! Sure, it’s not Doctor Xpress joint, but the money rolls in easy enough and he hasn’t had to murder any Mr. Bodys this time around for it. It was Ms. Peacock this time around! That’s more time to sell pills with rhinos on them to gas stations! Hell yeah! Let’s get to making the 12th Delta!

John Hurst is your host this week and and he needs to stop having kickstarter worthy ideas happen in the final minutes of the episode. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he is listening to someone else’s podcast in the car with them. You are the listener and we like YOU the most.

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Oh, damn! Looks like Timmy’s a big kid now! He’s got the double deep dish pizza lunchable with a cola and Reese’s cup! It’s where cravings and malnutrition meet and he’s at the height of his popularity! He’ll remember this day where he was the envy of all the other kids on his school lunch row as he lays upon his death bed with a sweet smile. He may not be able to devour either deep dish pizza nor the cola or the Reese’s Cup candy contained within, but these memories of envy will leave him in content. Or discontent. Timmy didn’t really eat well after the lunchable either.

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he has survived being sick using speed run strats!! John Hurst is your co-host and he’s disappointed by the seedy underside of his local community’s social media presence.

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